This Year's Nun Costumes...or What Nuns Dress Up As For Halloween

This year is certainly ripe with controversy over the lot of you and your fetish for not just nun costumes, but pregnant nun costumes. A certain, shall we say, overweight mom who was in the news earlier this year has also stirred up the pot donning a pregnant nun costume and dressing her "many" children as devils (see link).

Also in the news is Spencer's Gifts under the headline of "...markets vulgar Catholic Halloween costumes." One of their top sellers is the "Priest with an Erection" and "Pregnant Nun" costume, often sold as a pair. Well, I suppose in "layman" terms it makes sense.

So, this brings to mind what many of you ask, when, of course, you're not bothering us about doomsday predictions - what do nuns dress up as for Halloween? Well, here at Worldwide Nun Central we have been busy all week sewing away and finally caught a smoke break from the Singers'. Yes, we do wear costumes. Some sisters prefer to don a halo over their habit, which is a mere headpiece. Sister Fry Cook is dressing up as Emeril (don't ask). Mother Superior is dressing up as Friar Tuck. This required a bald rubber head piece (again, don't ask). Two of the sisters who are as thick as thieves dressed up as Cagney & Lacey. Hmm. And then there's always the very easy costume of donning a beak to look like a Penguin. One of our retro favorites is to dress up like The Penguin from the old Batman TV series. Or a couple of cut out milk cartons do well in making the wings on top of our habit heads to look like the Flying Nun. Films are a good source of inspiration. As you'll see from one of the photos I have here, Sister Smiles Too Much watched Wizard of Oz and got a couple of schoolchildren to dress up as elves. And as we're American nuns, sometimes it's just easier to dress up as a group of Trappist Brewery Nuns, such as you would find in Germany. So, this requires a trip to our local liquor store to order a keg of beer. (Mind you we tell them it's for charity, so we get a good rate on the tap.) After a few slogs of the brew we pretty much have convinced ourselves that we indeed brewed it ourselves. And then inevitably one of the sisters who has decided to be the Flying Nun makes an attempt at becoming airborne off the backyard picnic table.

So, enough for now, as I do have to return to the Singer sewing machine to finish my Freddie Krueger costume. Until next time, stay safe and I'd like to say don't take candy from strangers, but then that would ruin the whole holiday wouldn't it?

Mayans Insist the World Won't End in 2012.

As a nun we are often stopped in the street, at church during vespers, in the grocery store or receive phone calls at the convent, emails and letters from those worried about the various doomsday predictions. Lord knows how many we've had to endure. How would you like it if when Sister Fry Cook has just prepared her delicious souffle and we're about to dip our forks into it, but the phone rings or someone bangs on the door, wanting reassurance that we're not all going to float away (read: die) because of some Nostradamus prediction. (What was up with that guy? I assume his wife probably wasn't a very good cook and he got gas or heartburn a considerable amount of time, so took to his desk to predict many disasters, as he no doubt probably wished he'd just die already.)

That said, the latest prediction is the Mayan calendar running out on 12/12/2012, which has spawned numerous websites and a now, of course, a movie. (And how scary can it be, truly, if John Cusack's the star?) The Mayans have finally spoken out, that it is not the end of the world and they're more concerned with getting some rain soon (and don't bother them about that being a sign - just bring them some water).

So, as the cartoon shows, and I have long said, the reason their calendar runs out on said doomsday date is they probably ... just got tired of counting.

Now, if we can just have one dinner where we reach dessert, in peace...please.

Shroud of Turin or Jesus dish towel?

Well, in an attempt to prove that the blessed Shroud of Turin is no more real than our convent's Jesus dish towels, an Italian scientist claims to have recreated the said dish rag, using the same material available back in them Biblical times.

Next thing you know they'll claim that our Last Supper Lunchboxes were not made in the good ole US of A, but in China by Buddhist monks.

It isn't everyday your founder will be CANONIZED by THE POPE

This just in:
San Pedro Nuns Celebrate a Saint
"Their order's founder will be canonized at the Vatican next week. Thanks to their fundraising a local contingent will be there.
Organizing a country western hoedown was a first for the nuns. So were the carne asada sale and trips to the casino." -- Los Angeles Times (10/04/09)

Hi ho Sisters!